Colette Obrien

What if the Big Bang were the first kiss?

Aphrodite’s favorite child is Eros, or as the Romans named him, Amour. What does it mean to be the child of the goddess of Love but that he is her messenger? When that powerful goddess chooses to unite 2 objects by sending her son with his quiver of arrows, union is assured. Eros is the connecting force sent by the essence; Aphrodite.

The planet we inhabit revolves around a sun in a spiraling galaxy. On earth, the constant creation of life depends on a cycle of seasons; each one following the other in a continual round.  For life as we know it to endure, there must be a time of birth, growth, and destruction.

Aphrodite/Eros assure creation. Without the attraction of objects to one another there would be no new life.  The earth would stop spinning; the sun, having lost an admirer, would wobble out of control in dark despair and lose its place in the galaxy; with the loss of one of its members the billions of other stars would also loss hope/connection, and very quickly, what began as a first kiss, would end in a rout of unconnected atoms.

Thus spoke an incurable romantic. 

But seriously, love connects everything– it is a force–and maybe what physics calls the electromagnetic force is what we call love. Maybe the reason that we as humans cannot resist Eros’ arrow is because it’s correct to be so humbled; to realize through the experience of inescapable attraction, we’re being moved by a greater force than our small wills, and that that force is benevolent.

Wikipedia:

• In physics, attraction may refer to gravity or to the electromagnetic force
• Interpersonal attraction – the attraction between people which leads to friendships and romantic relationships.

At the level of physics, attraction describes a force that draws 2 objects together; is that the same thing as 2 people being attracted to one another? In other words, is there volition in the apparent choice to befriend another, or is it fated ? As human beings we believe we’re choosing when we relate to another, but is that a fact, or our ego’s claiming power when it, like a leaf on the wind, is being moved by something outside its awareness? The proverbial can of worms; fate or free-will.

When shot by Eros’  arrow of love, choice is not an option; we Fall in Love.  Most of us have had the experience of that trickster character and his mischievous arrows; even the Greek God Zeus trembled at his name.  The individual ego is flooded with love/attraction for an object, and cannot stop thinking or feeling about that special other.  What suddenly made that other so attractive? We call it mystery, chemistry, projection of our idealized lover, meeting with the soul-mate, but by whatever name we call it, we are helpless to resist and like the moth to the flame, we go. Burning with desire, we becoming fools for love.

The last time Eros shot me, I determined, resolutely, that never again did I wish to be so wounded.  Though painful in youth, the experience of being overwhelmed by the need for another as an adult was excruciating.  Like body-surfing an ocean wave,  it was exhilarating but when the wave pulls you under and twirls you around and around and won’t let you up for air, it is not so much fun.

 I love to love but do not enjoy being in love.  Like Zeus I know better than to believe I can prevent Eros from shooting me, if he will, but what does that mean, and what is the difference?

Do we really ever choose who to befriend, or is it all fated, karmic? And like the extreme of Falling in Love, is all love/attraction a kind of given that we experience but do not ever actually have a choice about?

Who the heck is Eros anyway? More tomorrow.